E.D.I.N.A. TOTE (Escalades Dominate Idyllic Neighborhood Aesthetic)| Uff Da Originals

Welcome to EDINA, where the SUVs are larger than the starter homes and nothing says “tasteful restraint” like a 6,000-pound pearl-white Escalade parked diagonally at Trader Joe’s.

This tote is a tribute to the unspoken truth of suburban design:
Curb appeal is dead. Long live chrome detailing.

Made from heavy-duty canvas and soft judgment, it’s perfect for:

• Carrying artisanal dog treats and vague emotional wounds

• Holding three bottles of wine and one unnecessary throw pillow

• Blocking an entire sidewalk at youth soccer games

• Flexing at the farmers market while pretending not to

It’s not just a tote.
It’s a lifestyle accessory with backup sensors.

Product features
- 100% cotton canvas for durability
- Flat corners for a sleek design
- Reinforced carrying handles for strength
- Heavyweight fabric (12 oz/yd²)
- Available in natural and black colors

Care instructions
- Do not iron directly over the printed area - print may stick to the iron.
- Spot clean
- Do not bleach
- Line dry